Hollow- A Short Narration

I sat still on the carpeted floor, back against the wall with a soft pillow behind me. I've never been able to sit straight- my mum has scolded me as much as she could, but I didn't change.

I cleared my throat and looked at the wall clock in front of me. 3:00a.m. The devils in you wake up after midnight they say, and I could feel them strangling me, holding my head so tight I could feel the pressure from within. I picked up my smartphone from beside me and unlocked it. Checked my messages- 218 messages from my college group. Thank God I kept that one on mute, it always buzzed in this exam season. I scrolled down, lower- as I realized how long it has been, until I finally saw his name.
His name.
Just mentally speaking that name sent some feelings in me, like an electric current that would flow through and through your veins, and out your fingertips.
I opened his chat. Not to my surprise anymore- online.
I looked at our last conversation, and the texts got longer and more intense as I scrolled up, my eyes trying to scan past the worse parts hastily.
That current I had, now turned into heavy hollowness. I felt that feeling again, of having something ripped out from inside of me. The wound was fresh again. I quickly pressed the home button and put my phone on silent, as I slammed it back into its place beside me.
Why?
Why do my eyes look for his name even today, even after knowing that there's only nothingness?
I took a deep breath and laid down on the floor in a pathetic, selfless fetal position, trying to somehow hold myself with such strength as to tie my pieces back- and hoping to be whole again. Whole and hollow, what an irony.